i had this old hollywood style dream- this guy was holding me and i was leaning back looking into his eyes. it was framed like an old movie where we were both in this staged embrace, wind blowing, 3 point lighting, kind of facing the “camera” which was my dream eye, and he said passionately, “I just know you’re mad about me!” and i was like, “oh yes i am absolutely mad about you Charles you know i am i just cannot hide it!” and we kissed, i woke up, still absolutely mad about “Charles.”
all of the Charles’s in my life, that i fall in love with, are never actually Charles. I’m the only fucking Charles i know. they are different people, and i am falling in love with myself, and breaking my own heart when their reality does not match my fantastic imagination.
i love you, Charles, i am absolutely mad about you- i’ll always love you.